When Anxiety is the culprit

Sometimes excitable and hyper children actually have other things contributing to this.  One, is anxiety.   It as not apparent to us when our son was younger, but once he began verbalizing how things were affecting him, especially school-related, such as doing well on tests, news reports, going to local events, etc. it became clear that there was more beneath the surface.  At first, this was very troubling.   My mind raced on as to how a child so young could worry about things so much.

It became clear that learning to relax had to become priority.  Sadly, in today's society, not much attention really is given to the ability to relax.  I know that some schools now have yoga classes and some even have meditation but I think even in health class, they could discuss how anxiety is a valid condition and how kids should think about treating it the same as "not smoking" or "not taking drugs"  - ways to avoid these and ways to avoid too much anxiety.   Smoking is bad for your lungs.  Anxiety is bad for everything.

If your child has anxiety, you may not want to wait to find out how it will affect them when they are older. The longer you live with that way of reacting, the more it becomes part of you.  Therapy and relaxation techniques can be built into your schedule as much as brushing your teeth and hanging up your coat.

Calming Activities: Chalk - Ages 3+

Along with molding clay, my son also settles down wonderfully with sidewalk chalk.  He can use his imagination for quite a long time out there.  I literally now stock up on big quantities since I know anytime I am outside now and I need him to stop running around and do something less crazy, I offer up chalk.

Sometimes you just need to find something tactile for their hands to stay busy... your child may not care for clay or beads, but might find something fascinating about creating their own games or drawings outside. 

Calming Activities: Recyclable Candy Art - Ages 3+

Do you have some old Halloween or Easter candy laying around? 

We decided to sit and concentrate on making fabulous art with our old Skittles and Starbursts.  Now, this is a tough one if your kids love to eat candy so if that's the case, I wouldn't choose this activity to calm them down!  These candies have a lot of red dyes in them and there is some controversy over the idea that red dyes can cause kids to become hyperactive...whether it's the sugar or the dyes we have pretty much stopped eating them in this household.

So, to put that stuff to good use some other way, I let them use them to make art!  Tip:  You may want to reward them with a healthier snack while they are doing this activity so they are not so tempted to eat the candy.  I laid out some graham crackers, milk and grapes for them to snack on instead.

Calming Activity: Beads - Ages 3+

Like using clay, beading is another activity that can really help kids settle down a bit.  It requires fine motor skills which is very useful for when they start writing.  It also lets them utilize other skills, like learning patterns, counting, all of course while indulging their creativity! 

On this particular day I asked my son to sort them by which ones he liked the best.  He seemed more interested in this rather than just saying sort the red ones from the blue ones, etc.  Plus, I wanted to see is reasoning for choosing certain ones that he liked better...whether he thought they were more sparkly, shinier, glassy-looking...in this instance, you can encourage your child to learn to describe something, and teach them what an adjective is!

Regardless, it still kept him busy and entertained so even without pressuring him to "do something" with the beads, just picking them up and playing with them randomly was enough.

Of course making necklaces and bracelets are also useful...great gifts for grandmas, aunts and cousins.

Calming Activities: Clay - Ages 3+

For some reason, my son really takes to sitting down playing with clay.   It is one of the few things that no matter what, I can put out and he will really get engrossed in it.

I believe a lot of it has to do with the tactile part of it; the fact that he can move it, bend it, mold it...it gives his hands a lot to do and therefore his body is less apt to be motoring around.

He appears to be making little fighting men or aliens out of it...he smashes them around and almost has some sort of imaginary world.  It is amazing.  I only wish I had taken stock out in Rose Art Modeling Clay company.

Calming Activity: Nature Scavenger Hunt - Ages 3+

Kids with a lot of energy sometimes react really well to being in nature.   The fresh air, the birds, the grass, the rocks...a backyard can be a wonderland of things!

Give your child a baggie and ask them to find 5 items in your backyard; such as, a pine cone, a rock (be specific, ask for a certain color rock), different colored leaves, a weed, a flower, a stick that is the length of their hand, some sand.

Calming Activities: Activity Center - Ages 3+

Put together an Activity Center, an area for them to go and work on a new activity when they need to focus and settle down. You will need to refresh the items frequently so they don’t get bored. Place 2-3 things on the table that they can work on. Don’t over-do it as too many items will likely cause distraction.

Suggested items:

o Tactile items such as: Molding clay, Tin foil, Bendaroos or even those flexible garbage bag twisty ties

o Crayons and blank paper

o Small empty recyclable containers like yogurt, applesauce cups and markers so they can decorate them

o A bag of noodles and cardboard cutouts. Using old cereal boxes, pre-cut some different shapes, like a butterfly, a bug, a heart, a car, stars, etc. The child can color the noodles with marker and then glue them on the pre-cut cardboard. Then, if you have any old magnets laying around (say like the ones you get in the mail free from local dentist offices, pizza places…) glue them on the back and walla, they have made cute magnets to give to their friends or family

o Several large rocks and markers. They can decorate the rocks and give them away as paper weights or collect them for their special “rock garden” someplace in the house or outside

o A container of loose buttons and string. Kids love to string things on and make necklaces. This requires some concentration and definitely provides motivation to focus. Throw some fancy, cute buttons in there. The craft store sells buttons with all sorts of themes.

o Set out an old magazine and some scissors. Make a list of pictures your child can cut out. Again, you will have to review the magazine ahead of time and make the list. Children get excited to see how many pictures they can find.

Calming Activities - Any Age

o A warm soak in the tub

o A back or shoulder massage (TIP: Use a nice scented lotion and have a smaller bottle of this same lotion that you can carry with you in your purse in case you need it for an Immediate Calm Down)

o Listening to soft or classical music (TIP: Keep a few of these songs on your ipod or a CD in your car when you travel in case you need it for an Immediate Calm Down)

o Reading a book together